NAPZA

 

The COVID-19 pandemic has made it additionally difficult for recovering drug addicts to recover and not relapse

He entered the living room – his eyes fell on his 18-month-old daughter.

He has not slept for days after having binged on crystal meth, marijuana and Happy Five pills,

which are meant to problems including medicate anxiety and muscle spasms but are often abused for recreational purposes.

the 44-year-old Jakarta-based , father of two. 

He  has asked to use a pseudonym to protect his family’s privacy,

on another occasion, his wife went ballistic after finding yet another stash of weed in their car.

“[She] was about to use the car when she found it,” he said.

Having used drugs since 1992, Rian acknowledged that his past,

with emotionally unavailable parents who often beat him as a child,

had driven him to drugs and eventually, addiction.

 

Marijuana became his gateway drug – but soon enough other drugs followed. 

“I never felt that I was good enough,” he added, reflecting on his past. 

Years went by and Rian became engulfed in his addiction to the point of juggling two – sometimes three – jobs just so he could buy drugs.

 

His relationship with his wife also became strained. 

One night, he started thinking long and hard about his two children – now an 11-year-old boy and a 9-year-old girl.

 “I can’t bear [the idea] of having to explain to them should I ever get caught by the police and sent to prison.

The day after - on May 7, 2014 - Rian drove himself to a rehabilitation center and checked himself in.

 

he has been clean ever since. 

“I stuck around and here I am until today,” he said.

 

Separately, 30-year-old Dina, a mother of one also based in Jakarta,

 

she hit rock bottom back in 2018.

 

Having binged on various drugs from cocaine, ecstasy pills, marijuana to benzodiazepine for months,

She also asked to use a pseudonym to protect her anonymity –

She was caught by the police one night. 

“I had some cocaine in my possession at the time.

As I sobered up at the police headquarters, I started looking at my life – my choices.

 

I have a son [who at the time was] still a baby.

 It clicked with me: what am I doing with my life?” she recalled,

 

she was experiencing seizures and

the experience traumatized her. 

“Thankfully, I wasn’t jailed – I was able to be bailed out.”

 

After spending months in rehab –,

Dina was finally able to find recovery from her drug addiction.

She returned to Jakarta in late 2018 and continued seeing a therapist regularly.

friends still use drugs and drink alcohol but she does not judge them.

 

They have relapsed as a result of financial and social pressure caused by the pandemic.

Edward currently resides in Bali for recovery-

He admitted that he relapsed five months ago before returning to recovery. 

“I got out of rehab and wanted to do drugs again,” he said. “As soon as I left rehab all I wanted was just some relief.”

Edward preferred to use his first name only for this article.

‘Silver lining’

She was initially scared of relapsing due to the pandemic

“As the pandemic came – all meetings [moved] online.

 

she had also broken up from a long-distance relationship because of the pandemic.

“There’s a feeling of loneliness ,

 we all have to be connected digitally only.” 

Dina immersed herself in the program even further – attending meetings and other recovery programs.

I can’t go to a meeting or connect with people.

The pandemic led many recovering drug addicts to feel alone,

It could become overwhelming.

physical meetings became unavailable.

“I need my support system –

I cannot explain my disease to my family. They don’t understand.”

Rian has witnessed people attending meetings online.

“On a daily basis, I see 50 to 60 people in one online meeting.

[Meetings] are now just one click away and

they’re available every day all over the world. 

. I [merely] see the silver lining,” Rian added.

 

He stressed the need for community, now more than ever: “ by maintaining unity that we get through tough times. 

This applies not only to addicts, but to everyone.

 

***

The first couple of months after the start of the COVID-19 pandemic were rough for me.

I was still dealing with the sudden death of my partner.

He was diagnosed with brain cancer in September 2019, and

He succumbed to the illness seven months later.

Suddenly, I had to cope with my personal grief and

I have to coper the reality of having to live alone again after six years in a relationship.

Virtually no one around me could offer 100 percent of their support because of the pandemic lockdown, but I managed.

If we're being totally honest here, one of the hardest struggles was …

 

Obviously, I couldn't meet partners physically,

 

As a recovering sex and drug addict, I knew I had to be mindful as I explored the internet looking for online hookups.

After a while, I was introduced to a group where guys would virtually meet regularly for …

 

Firstly, it's important to note online intimacy is not a guaranteed solution: It won't work for everyone, for a variety of reasons.

 

as the mind needs increasingly intense stimulus to reach the same level of arousal.

To counter that effect, he recommends "taking breaks for several days at a time.

skip the and go au naturel.

"Try using your own imagination a little bit more instead of the.

This can tackle any potential reliance on these external factors for arousal.

the biggest organ is the brain—so try to use it.